No apologies.
I very nearly bit off more than I could chew this year.
I've been overwhelmed so much of the time that it's almost a novelty to think "I've got this!"
I can't count how many times I've wanted to throw in the towel and just move back to Washington, to a less intense, more familiar type of life.
Would I regret it forever?
Yep.

I'm really tired in a lot of ways.
But I'm really thankful too.
It's too bad that I forget about that on a regular basis.
I forget how good I've got it, how I work for an amazing and world famous organization, how I've been so welcomed by so many, how God has blessed me with everything I really need...
So here's to my yearly reminder that I am loved, despite me.

I've got that VeggieTales song running through my head, "I thank God for this day, for the sun in the sky, for my mom and my dad, for my piece of apple pie..."

And on that note, thank you God for you, for your grace, your forgiveness, your controlled anger, your willingness to listen to dust and vapor, your goodness, your justice, for not being fair.

P.S. Also, thank you for:

A family that loves me for me, it's kind of baffling.
Too many friends to keep up with, a blessing and a point of frustration, but mostly a blessing
Amazingly intelligent coworkers who are willing to teach me what they know, and empathize about the day to day chaos
The opportunity to do things most people don't even think to dream about... I've nursed bald eagles back to health, no biggie.
Constant reminders that in the big scheme of things, I know nothing
An affordable place to live that's not in a soul-sucking apartment complex
A wonderful kitty cat who's okay with being squeezed and held upside down while having his belly rubbed and who sometimes replaces my alarm clock
The opportunity to save a baby starling's life and have him as a friend, even if it was for only a short time
Finnegan finding a new, excellent, home
A paycheck that lets me eat what I want and also afford other little things
Good food
A Chipotle that just so happens to be on my way home from work
A car that runs
New tires on said car
A comfortable bed, desk on permanent loan, and a nest of a chair
A nearby library
Photographs of good times past so I can remember
Doctor Who and My Little Ponies, my escapes from reality when it was all just a little too much to face
The opportunity to go to BroNYcon
A computer that has survived several moves, drops, and a mug of peppermint tea
The opportunity to live so close to so many historical things... seriously, I live within a 3 hour radius of Philly, Baltimore, D.C. and NYC
The ability to build and repair and paint and draw and power tool it up
My little Tardis
My new cellphone that works surprisingly well
And so many many many more wonderful things that I could think of, but right now I'm just too tired and have to get up early
Oh yes, and finally, thanks for a job that lets me work mostly opening shifts

Much Love :)
Em

I'm still alive!

Oh wow... the things that you forget when you don't have readily available internet! Like not blogging for almost three months... oops?

Oh well, life goes on.

Just wanted to say a few things to the world :)

I love my job. It's stressful and intimidating at times (okay, intimidating a lot of the time), but overall, I get to do some pretty darn cool things, and handle some pretty amazing birds.

Delaware is not my favorite state ever... too many people, not enough trees and mountains. But the people are usually quite nice, and I guess it's nice to have everything close by. Being surrounded by so much history is a bit overwhelming at times. However, the Brandywine River runs through Wilmington... kinda cool, just sayin'.

I wear a ring now, given to me by a very dear friend. It's taken quite a lot of getting used to, and I almost lost it to an oiled goose in a tube full of Dawn and water. But so far so good.

Oh yes, and yesterday I went and got a new tattoo, downtown Philadelphia, all by myself. My little larger than life baby quail :) His feet are a little wonky, but his face is adorable, so it all works out. My arm really hurts though...

I think that's about it for now. Hopefully it won't be another 3 months before I remember my blog exists!

Feliz Navidad

Christmas.

It's that time of year to be contemplative, and giving, and excited, and all that jazz.

It's the time of year when you can, if you'd like, be completely floored by the mercy that God showed to humanity.

After spending a significant amount of time with babies and toddlers this week, I've gotten a new appreciation for the fact that Jesus had to come to earth as a baby. I mean seriously, being God and having to deal with spit, drool, and gas bubbles... I wonder if He ever looked back and said 'ew'. Maybe it's just me being superficial, but that's pretty impressive. And even passing the baby stage... God learning how to talk, how to interact with people, having to go through puberty, growth spurts, and awkwardness. That's a lot of love right there, people.

I've discovered, since coming back to Washington, that a lot of my friends and family live in a secluded Christian world, where evolutionists, atheists, and agnostics are either frowned on, or even openly mocked in the Christian home. That's wrong. No way around that, sorry. Jesus came to earth not for the healthy, but for the sick. He wasn't simplistic, happy go lucky, or an ignorer of the facts of human nature. He hung out with the outcasts of society, He understood their struggles. He loved on them, but He also told them the truth in love, not condemnation (well, except the pharisees... but they're kind of a special case). Come to find out, that's a super delicate balance to keep. I don't know many people who are willing or capable of doing both.

I guess it just hit me hard the other day when someone went on a lecture about judgement and damnation, and I had to remind them that atheists are people too, and sometimes... no, all the time... mercy and love are what we should display. Who are we to judge? We are saved by the grace of God and absolutely nothing else. Not to say we should condone, but neither are we to condemn.

Still trying to figure out what that looks like.

But thank you Jesus, for being human for me and all the people who love you, and even for the ones who don't. Whether they feel it or not, your mercy is an overwhelming and beautiful thing, and is my prayer that some of my dearest friends would feel that love somehow, someway, this Christmas.

Goodbye. Hello.

I'm saying goodbye to Texas tomorrow! Ahhhh! I'm sad to say goodbye :(

Happy to say hello to Washington again :)

Scared to death to get to know Delaware :S

Oh yeah, did I mention that I got the job at Tri-State Bird Rescue & Research in Newark, DE?

Did I mention I'm coming home for two weeks?

That I really need to buy a car, ASAP?

That I need to see everyone before I move away again?!

I'm so nervous to move to a new place, new job, new people... I need to find a church as soon as I get there, otherwise I get the feeling that making friends will not be easy. It's so much more convenient when you live with the people you work with.

I died my hair 'black cherry' today. It's purple. It's pretty :) This may become my new addiction...

I need to write my year in review. Despite the fact that I didn't really go anywhere, it was a pretty darn crazy year!

*sniffle* I'm going to miss all my Texans so very much :'(

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving is today. Wow.

It's shaping up to be a good one :)

I have the day off (yay!) so I get to make the turkey and gravy and pies.

Funny thing is, being a (mostly) vegetarian for several years, means that I don't really know much about cooking meat... at least not an entire bird.

I was putting our turkeys and roosters to bed last night, and told Pew Pew (our sweet de-beaked turkey) that I was eating his cousin tomorrow. And then I felt bad...

(Apparently I like parenthesis today)

I was reading old blogs the other day and found my string of Thankful For... blogs. I wish I'd remembered that sooner! But oh well, I guess a thankful list will have to do.

*ahem*

I am thankful for:

*The good timing of Thanksgiving this year, I've been whining a lot

*Work, because of how much it has taught me

*A crazy cool job

*My bed, because crazy cool job makes me crazy tired

*Friends who keep in touch

*Friends who don't

*Friends who let me borrow their cars when living in the middle of nowhere

*Fletcher, even when he's cranky, he's always up for a cuddle

*Hot chocolate with Irish Cream

*A computer that has a power cable with no cuts or chew marks

*Delicious food, and the ability to cook and bake

*My cellphone, so I can talk to people who I can't see

*Pipe cleaners, mainly because they make Fletcher uber happy, which makes me laugh

*The ability to sew, because little stuffed animals make people happy

*Cleaning supplies, they're good for OCD people like me

*Music that fits every mood (yay Pandora!)

*My Little Ponies, because they've made my year just that much better

*Good movies and good books in which to escape from reality

*The ability to wrangle raccoons, squirrels, skunks, emus, sheep, goats, raptors, giant tortoises, snakes, nutrias, deer, porcupines, and opossums. Not too many people can claim that :)

*My camera that captures so many good memories

*A God who sacrificed everything in order to bring me forgiveness

*A God who I can talk to as a friend and a savior

*The hope that someday all wrongs will be rightened, and every tear will be wiped away

*The hope that one day death will be swallowed up in victory

Happy Thanksgiving y'all :)

Crazy Week

To answer everyone's question: the interview went really well on my end. I hope they liked me as much as I liked them. Beautiful facility, so nice, so well organized! So much less... extreme? than WRR. At least you can call the birds 'it' if you don't know their gender. And they don't have a problem with you hand raising non-indigenous birds in your home and making them into pets. So yeah, I'm praying hard that I get this job. But just to be on the safe side, I'm still looking for jobs to apply for. Found a good one through the HSUS... it's a start.

The entire trip out to Delaware was pretty crazy. Good, bad, and slightly insane, with some laughter thrown in for good measure. Jennifer still hasn't found a place to live in Virginia, so we stayed at a hotel one night, and then at her new boss' 'currently being renovated house' the other night. I'm praying that she finds a place to live soon though, since she started work today. So my job for pretty much the entire 4 days was to keep her from having a panic attack :P But on the upshot, her new job looks fantastic! And it's in a beautiful location (p.s. I'm in love with the countryside of Virginia/Delaware/Maryland, the fall colors were gorgeous). We also got to do a crazy driving tour of D.C. and I finally got to see the White House, the Washington Monument, Lincoln Memorial, Arlington, etc. :)

On another note, we got a baby nighthawk in at work the other day (in case you were wondering, totally the wrong time of year for that!). He was adorable! We also got a juvi nutria, who someone was trying to raise as a pet. He's really friendly, and fits in my hand. Super cute as well :)

Now that Jupiter (Jennifer's cat) is gone, Fletcher has turned into the cuddliest cat ever! It's so weird... Not that I mind having him sleep with me again, it's just such an extreme change.

I think that's about it for now.

P.S. Never get a 50 minute layover. Guaranteed, your flight will be late, and you will have to run like a crazy person across the Houston airport, and be the last person to board the plane, and people will not be happy with you.

My cat is angry.

Just a coupla things, ya know.

I've got a working interview in Delaware on Thursday. At Tri-State Bird Rescue. Woot woot!! I'm so freakin' nervous. But I really really want this job, for so many reasons! But the main one is pretty obvious I would hope... I mean... birds... duh.

Janna is getting married?! Whoa. Just whoa. I need to be there for that (another reason why I want to get this job). It's crazy to think that someone I've known since I was 4 years old is getting married...

I couldn't post this on facebook because people freak out too easily, but I just have to say, I have the bestest platonic boyfriend ever! He got a kukri, and sent me his old machete. Which is Gerber, and has a saw on the back side of it. It's lovely :) Weird things make me happy....

I think that's about it for now.

Miss you all.

So much.