28 February 2009

At the moment...

...I'm really stressed out. Turns out I have 3 exams before spring break, and I'm not even close to ready for any of them. Really, who names a muscle pubo-ischio-femoralis externus?! Group projects are something that I have hated ever since I started college... oh why must I care so much?! And yes, hormones make everything ten times worse than they need to be...

BUT

Good things:
* I have groceries now
* Totoro is being watched again, love it!
* Robbie came up to the lab with me and helped me run gels
* tea, tea is good
* I'm sitting on my favorite blue and white quilt
* I have a Totoro t-shirt
* Jamie says, and I quote, "Pandas!!!"
* Kiira and Becca are here
* Brian's hat is wonderful
* I have 3 Emilie Autumn songs now
* Blueberry dwarf hamsters
* Hank the Cowdog
* um... that's all that I can come up with, but I'm sure there must be more...

27 February 2009

:)

I haven't watched My Neighbor Totoro since summer 2007, and oh. my. goodness. I'd forgotten just how wonderful it is. Yeah, I know, you're probably thinking "anime, you nerd". I may be a nerd, but really, this movie is so cute... see?


This scene makes me squeal, every time :P

25 February 2009

It's raining today. And I mean really raining. Almost Long Beach rain raining.

I have a cup of tetley with milk and sugar at medium woot (on a scale of 1 to zomg)

There is a blue and white (and oh so warm) quilt wrapped around me.

The rain is dripping off the tips of pine needles just outside my window, in little sparkly drops.

There is a cricket chirping away nearby.

And my anatomy book is open in front of me.

....

This is me. Love me for it, and in spite of it.

24 February 2009

Making plans...

There are many plans in a man's heart... Prov. 19:21

We all have a lot of plans on what we're doing after graduation, or with our lives, and yet we can't control when our next breath will happen...

Commit your works to the Lord, and your thoughts will be established. Prov. 16:3

Make your plans with Him, not make your plans, get a heavenly stamp of approval, and move on, for...

When a man's ways please the Lord, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Prov. 16:7

Follow after the Lord, that is our whole duty and purpose. He will take care of the rest. He promised, and it pleases Him to do so.

But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things will be added to you. Do not fear little flock, for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. Luke 12:31-32

22 February 2009

Lucky Cricket

Ok, so maybe not so lucky, but when I found him I thought of Cricky in Mulan. Anyway, a couple weeks back I was in the lab, running gels, and almost stepped on a cricket. Weird, since no one works with crickets on Eastlick 2nd floor (at least not that I know of). So I scooped him up in a beaker, covered it with filter paper, and took it home. Cricky now lives with Hermione, and has made a burrow underneath her tea jar house. He likes apples, too. But the best part of the story is that last week I picked up the jar to check on him, and saw that his back was bright white, from the newly grown pair of wings. They hardened quickly and turned lacy brown and black.

There is a cricket chirping in my bedroom :)

19 February 2009

My boys

A couple years back a friend described the UCB boys as "our boys" and on many occasions "my boys". For some reason this irked me greatly. But just recently I've realized that that term is kind of appropriate in my life right now.

I define my boys as the ones that I can see as my brothers in Christ.
The ones who aren't afraid to hug me when I'm having a bad day.
The ones who know how to tease me correctly.
The ones who will walk me home (if I ask).
The ones that are considerate of my feelings.
The ones who aren't afraid to tell me if I look nice.
The ones who make brownies.
The ones who would protect me if I need protection.
The ones who restore my faith in the male half of humanity on a daily basis.
The ones that I can see are becoming gentlemen, and are genuinely striving after our God, despite the failures and struggles.
It's quite inspiring.
They're my boys, they're my brothers.
I love them.

Some are single, some are taken, heck, one of them likes me, but no matter their connections they remain my brothers, first and foremost in my mind. So thanks, boys. I appreciate you more than you'll ever know.

17 February 2009

Aaaand another one bites the dust

I'm happy for them, I really am.

That is all.

16 February 2009

A poem I wrote at CCC (and a wombat :)


Have you ever heard of the Wombat Moon?
When the animals gather in the midst of June?
Numbat, Wallaby, Tiger, and Deer,
To frolic ’neath the celestial sphere

They come from near and very far
Guided by a shining star
For it is a time of gladness and glee
Of happiness and unity

The Luna moth floats in first,
Honeyed tea slakes her thirst,
She rests her green gossamer wings,
And then to the Wombat Moon she sings

On this night the Cat won’t chase the Mouse
Nor does the Lynx stalk the Grouse
The Aardwolf eats not the Ants
Instead all gather paws and dance

The Hyena’s face holds a silly grin
As he waltzes with the Penguin twin
The scent of jasmine floats on the air
And the animals frolic without a care

The Antelope kick up their hooves
The herd of Wildebeesties moves
To whistle upon fanciful flutes
With their playful friends the Bandicoots

This my friend, is the Wombat Moon
A magical time in the midst of June
Where all God’s creatures, both great and small
Gather to dance in the Lunar Ball

Silly girl

Yes, I am a silly girl. I like boys, probably too much for my own good. And for some reason that's where all my conversations with my girl friends have ended up lately. I wish sometimes (often times) that God would make it obvious that He has gifted me with singleness, and then I can roll up my jean legs, kick off the shoes, and run through the fields, focusing on God and what he has for me to do.

But that's not what God has given me.

I know that I have been given a great capacity to love, and especially when I have come close to "being in a relationship" this becomes even more obvious. If I ever find the right guy, I know that I will hold on to him (often literally, I'm sure :P) and love and respect him until death does us part.

I want to be loved, cherished, and pushed into corners and kissed like there's no tomorrow. *sigh*. Yep, I'm a hopeless romantic, and that's all there is to it. Sorry if that was too much information, but it's been on my mind a lot lately. And I know that in this state it's more important than ever to take every thought captive (thanks for reminding me of that, Brooke), so that I can wait on God's timing, believing that He knows who is best for me, and also when is best for the both of us, whoever he is.

Protecting hearts = a very good thing!

15 February 2009

Baby elephants

I love my housemates

Sooooo much

I also love the wonderful boys who, although there is no genetic relationship, I can call my brothers

It's a beautiful thing how God can unite people who otherwise would never have been friends, and probably would have never met each other

I may be cranky and antisocial sometimes. And take homework to Rico's. And not always dance at CJ's. And stand in the corner sometimes. But honestly, I treasure my time with you all, and honestly believe that these years are some of the best of my life.

And yes, baby elephants... and giraffes

12 February 2009

Drips of conciousness

Life is so confusing

And yet at the same time, it's so simple

A robin perched outside my window makes me smile, even as I describe it's fluffyness as an attempt to increase it's boundary layer

Threadless t-shirts rock my... well, technically my torso and shoulders

There is a coracoid process on the subscapular side of the cat scapula, above the glenoid fossa

I have an anatomy lab exam tonight, and now understand why people disappear when they take this class

Someday I want to be kissed while climbing a tree

I like swings a lot, even if they do make me queasy sometimes

Missing people or worrying about them does absolutely nothing unless you do something about it

To myself I am only my dreams, to others I am only my actions

Kittens, ferrets, baby chickens & quails, and hamster piles

Double bergamont earl gray tea is amazing; almost as amazing at Tetley, but not quite

God is outside of time. Think about that one for awhile

He also knows what's best, and complaining is not constructive nor enjoyable to be around

Sunfleck is actually a word. Oh, the possibilities!

Cuddle puddle. I wants one.

08 February 2009

Extraordinary?

In church today the sermon involved the Holy Spirit coming upon people in extraordinary ways. That said, I had an epiphany which was somewhat unrelated.

A lot of people lately have been telling me that I'm cool, or spunky, or amazing, or smart, etc. Not gonna lie, I tend to not believe it. But during the sermon today I realized that I am actually a rather extraordinary person. Don't take this the wrong way, I haven't suddenly become a narcissist, I've just realized that God has given me a lot of random and rather unique gifts, especially within my circle of Christian friends.

That said, God has made me amazing, but without Him, it means absolutely, positively, zip zero, nada, nothing. I need to use my gifts to serve Him and others in amazing ways, and in areas that are often not given much attention by Christians. Like my major.

So yeah, I don't usually know what to do with myself, but that's okay, because I am not my own, I have been bought with a price.

02 February 2009

This morning dew called life

I prayed yesterday morning (after waking up at 11:00 a.m. oops) and found the song "I Surrender All." I guess I had never actually read the words to that song, because they made me cry when I realized I cling to sooo much of my life. I was called a planner a few weeks ago, and I realized how true that is. If things don't go the way I plan, I whine or get mad. I am such a twit.

I wish that I could control how my graduate school application is reviewed, and make the university accept me into their program. But I can't.

I wish I could control my emotions, and make things work out with certain people, because they really are wonderful. But I can't.

I wish I could be disciplined and self controlled, and beat those perpetual sins into the mud beneath my feet. But I can't.

I wish I could make things work out between all my friends so they stop hurting. But I can't.

I wish that I could control how my job applications are reviewed, and make people give me the job I want. But I can't.

I wish I could control my life. BUT I CAN'T.

*sigh*

In a sense I am trying to do God's job, and when a person does that they are ALWAYS bound for failure. So why do I try? I wish I knew. What I do know is that it needs to stop.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Humbly at His feet I bow,
Worldly pleasures all forsaken,
Take me Jesus, take me now.
I surrender all,
I surrender all,
All to thee my blessed Savior
I surrender all

Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.